Nerd Culture Podcast

Ok I said that this would be the final installment, but I just discovered a whole bunch of other remakes I want to rate, so there will be a part 5! 🙂

The Stepfather

Released: 1987

Directed by: Joseph Ruben

Starring: Terry O’Quinn, Jill Shoelen

Plot: A man murders his family then moves to another town and starts a new life as a different person. But soon his past catches up with him and he has to murder again.

For: Terry O’Quinn is a legend and gives his usual A+ performance / Surprisingly entertaining film

Against: The rest of the acting is pretty bad, especially the brother in law that tracks him down / Jill’s nude shower scene is both pointless and a little creepy – normally I wouldn’t be averse to some nudity, but this scene stops the film dead just as it is gearing up for the finale, and is inappropriate because her character is meant to be only 15/16 years old.

Favourite Scene: Jerry forgets who he is supposed to be in front of his wife

Rating: 3 Lukes

The Stepfather

Released: 2009

Directed by: Nelson McCormick

Starring: Penn Bagley, Dylan Walsh, Sela Ward

Plot: A man murders his family then moves to another town and starts a new life as a different person. But soon his past catches up with him and he has to murder again.

For: Can’t think of anything

Against: Boring / bad acting / a son instead of a daughter / no Terry O’Quinn

Favourite Scene: None

Rating: 0.5 Lukes

Winner: The original is a masterpiece compared to its piece of crap remake

The Stepford Wives

Released: 1975

Directed by: Bryan Forbes

Starring: Katherine Ross, Paula Prentiss, Peter Masterson

Plot: Joanna and her family move to picturesque town Stepford. But not is all that it seems, with the women of the town behaving weirdly and the Stepford Men’s Association seemingly calling the shots.

For: Cool idea, good acting, great ending

Against: Slow at times

Favourite Scene: Joanna 2.0

Rating: 3 Lukes

The Stepford Wives

Released: 2004

Directed by: Frank Oz

Starring: Nicole Kidman, Bette Midler, Mathew Broderick, Christopher Walken, Glenn Close

Plot: Joanna, a stressed out TV executive, moves to the town of Stepford with her family after the disaster of her last TV project. There she makes a couple of new friends, but the majority of the women there are shallow bimbos and all the men are part of the Stepford Men’s Association boys club. Eventually Joanna discovers that the women are android replicas of the wives of Stepford.

For: Nothing – ok, I’ll give it that it has a great cast  – but they are are wasted in this insipid so called comedy.

Against: Everything else – from the reality TV show about men replacing their wives with prostitutes (see what they did there!! genius!!!), to the remote controlled inflatable boobies, this film is a perfect example of how not to make a movie. It is an insult to the original film, as well as women everywhere. Kidman, Broderick & Midler have all disowned this piece of rubbish and I can see why.

Favourite Scene: Um, none.

Rating: 0 Lukes

Winner: I don’t acknowledge the remake, so the original wins it!

Psycho

Released: 1960

Directed by: Alfred Hitchcock

Starring: Anthony Perkins, Vera Miles, Janet Leigh

Plot: The film depicts the encounter between a secretary, hiding at a secluded motel after embezzling money from her employer, and the motel’s disturbed owner and manager, Norman Bates, and the aftermath of their encounter

For: Magnificent performance by Perkins / a masterclass in ‘it’s what you don’t see that is truly frightening’ / that shower scene / The use of light and shadow / its visual representations for our psyche / my 2nd favourite Hitchcock film

Against: Are you serious?

Favourite Scene: ‘We all go a little crazy sometimes.’

Rating: 5 Lukes

Psycho

Released: 1998

Directed by: Gus Van Sant

Starring: Vince Vaughn, Anne Heche, Julianne Moore

Plot: The film depicts the encounter between a secretary, hiding at a secluded motel after embezzling money from her employer, and the motel’s disturbed owner and manager, Norman Bates, and the aftermath of their encounter

For: I can’t think of a single thing, except its always good to see Viggo Mortensen.

Against: As much as I hate the Stepford Wives remake, at least it tried to create a new take on the story, whereas this is an almost shot for shot recreation, except Van Sant is no Hitchcock and Vaughn is no Perkins. So, what’s the point? A complete waste of money and time / and seriously, Anne Heche in the Janet Leigh role………

Favourite Scene: None

Rating: 0.5 Lukes

Winner: It’s not even a contest, the original.

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Released: 1984

Directed by: Wes Craven

Starring: Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, Johnny Depp, John Saxon

Plot: Child killer Freddy Krueger is killing the teenagers of Springwood in their dreams, but if you die in the dream you die in real life. The teenagers are unaware of the cause of this strange phenomenon, but their parents hold a dark secret from long ago.

For: The start of a incredibly successful franchise for New Line, and a great example of the slasher film. Instead of going for cheap scares it plays with the audiences concept of reality to great effect. It also introduces a great villain in Freddy Krueger (at least until some of the sequels screwed him up).

Against: Aside from Englund, the acting is pretty ordinary / None of the kids seem all that scared to be honest.

Favourite Scene: Tina in the bodybag / the bathtub scene

Rating: 3.5 Lukes

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Released: 2010

Directed by: Samuel Bayar

Starring: Jackie Earle Haley, Kyle Gallner, Rooney Mara, Clancy Brown

Plot: Child molester Freddy Krueger is killing the teenagers of Springwood in their dreams, but if you die in the dream you die in real life. The teenagers are unaware of the cause of this strange phenomenon, but their parents hold a dark secret from long ago.

For: While not as good as Englund, Haley does a decent job as Krueger / the kids actually seem scared / some decent imagery / micro naps idea ok / Clancy Brown!

Against: Not scarey or even creepy / Quinten runs around in his bathers for a ridiculously long time / not a single likeable character in the group

Favourite Scene: Flashback of Freddy’s death is pretty cool (except poor Quinten in his smalls)

Rating: 2 Lukes

Winner: Just think of the remake as a bad dream.

Planet of the Apes

Released: 1968

Directed by: Franklin J Schaffner

Starring: Charlton Heston, Roddy McDowall, Kim Hunter, Maurice Evans,

Plot: Astronaut Taylor crash lands on a desolate planet and is captured by intelligent apes. He believes he is on an alien world but eventually discovers the truth.

For: A classic of sci-fi and one of my all time favourite films / Performances are all great, even the over the top acting of Heston works here / The ape makeup was revolutionary for the time / Linda Harrison is gorgeous / That ending!

Against: Nothing

Favourite Scene: Too many to list here, but of course the end scene wins it

Rating: 5 Lukes

Planet of the Apes

Released: 2001

Directed by: Tim Burton

Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Estelle Warren, Helena Bonham Carter, Tim Roth

Plot: An astronaut lands on a planet inhabited by humanoid apes, who rule the planet with an iron fist.

For: The ape army looks badass / the ape makeup is quite good

Against: Everything else. This movie is a travesty, even Tim Burton hates it.

Favourite Scene: Can’t think of one.

Rating: 0.5 Lukes

Winner: We seem to have a bit of a theme happening here, the original wins it again!

Ring (Ringu)

Released: 1998

Directed by: Hideo Nakata

Starring: Nanako Matsushima, Miki Nakatani, Yûko Takeuchi

Plot: A haunted video tape kills whomever views it, unless that viewer can solve its mystery.

For: Sadako is a great villain / Interesting premise – face the horror ourselves or deliberately inflict it on another / the images on the video tape

Against: Raped by a sea monster???

Favourite Scene: The first time you see Sadako will stay with you for a long time

Rating: 3 Lukes

The Ring

Released: 2002

Directed by: Gore Verbinski

Starring: Naomi Watts, Martin Henderson, Brian Cox

Plot: A haunted video tape kills whomever views it, unless that viewer can solve its mystery.

For: Samara is a great villain / Interesting premise – face the horror ourselves or deliberately inflict it on another / the images on the video tape / the sea monster plot is removed

Against: Although still cool, Samara is just not as creepy as Sadako

Favourite Scene: Samara’s first appearance

Rating: 3.5 Lukes

Winner: Well we finally have one that breaks the trend. The remake is tighter and more coherent than the original and simply more enjoyable – but only just.

And now, another triple hitter!

Piranha

Released: 1978

Directed by: Joe Dante

Starring: Bradford Dillman, Heather Menzies, Kevin McCarthy

Plot: A school of genetically engineered piranha are accidentally unleashed on a summer camp and lakeside resort with horrific consequences. Local drunk Paul, and insurance investigator Maggie attempt to stop the carnage.

For: A light hearted horror film, with tongue firmly in cheek / the piranha attacks look ridiculous, but somehow still cool

Against: The piranha look terrible / terrible acting / not as funny as it thinks it is / not even slightly scary

Favourite Scene: All the piranha attacks

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

Piranha

Released: 1995

Directed by: Scott P Levy

Starring: William Katt, Soleil Moon Frye, Mila Kunis, Alexandra Paul

Plot: A school of genetically engineered piranha are accidentally unleashed on a summer camp and lakeside resort with horrific consequences. Local resident Paul, and private investigator Maggie attempt to stop the carnage.

For: Uses the piranha attack footage from the original!

Against: A made for cable TV remake that takes out the comedy = pointless / The piranha still look terrible / terrible acting / not even slightly scary

Favourite Scene: Susie saves the day!

Rating: 1.5 Lukes

Piranha 3D

Released: 2010

Directed by: Alexandre Aja

Starring: Elisabeth Shue, Adam Scott, Christopher Lloyd, Ving Rhames, Kelly Brook, Jerry O’Connell

Plot: An earthquake opens a fissure leading to an underground lake at Lake Victoria and unleashes a school of prehistoric piranha onto Spring Break revelers. Sheriff Julie Forester attempts to stop the killer fish.

For: Good to see Elisabeth Shue and Christopher Lloyd / Piranhas look cool

Against: Pointless Richard Dreyfuss cameo at the start / incredibly boring, especially the over-long ‘babes under the boat’ bit / uses that stupid speed up-slow down technique that appears to be so trendy at the moment / 3D Penis……

Favourite Scene: This is a stretch, but all I can think of is Ving Rhames vs the piranha with a handheld outboard motor.

Rating: 1 Luke

Winner: The original takes a bite out of the inferior remakes

I hope you liked part 4. Stay tuned for the final, part 5, coming soon.

Godzilla (Gojira)

Released: 1954

Directed by: Ishiro Honda

Starring: Akira Takarada, Momoko Kochi, Takashi Shimura

Plot: A giant lizard monster, mutated by nuclear radiation, wrecks havoc on Japan

For: A not very subtle analogy for the devastating affects of nuclear weapons, Godzilla is a landmark film and classic of sci-fi. Serizawa is cool.

Against: Very slow to start.

Favourite Scene: Serizawa sacrifices himself to kill Godzilla and ensure his terrible weapon is lost forever

Rating: 4 Lukes

Godzilla

Released: 1998

Directed by: Roland Emmerich

Starring: Mathew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo

Plot: Following a nuclear incident in French Polynesia, a lizard’s nest is irradiated by the fallout. Decades later this lizard has grown to gigantic size and attacks New York.

For: While not as cool as the original, the Godzilla re-design is not all bad / the SFX are also ok

Against: Everything else. This movie is an insult to the original film, as well as all other films. It is boring, nonsensical, over the top rubbish and should have been the point when people realised that Emmerich had no talent (but no, they still let him do 10,000 BC). It is also has the 2nd worst tag line I’ve ever seen – Size Does Matter. Need I say more?

Favourite Scene: Godzilla vs the submarine!

Rating: 0.5 Lukes

Winner: The original stomps all over the piece of crap remake (sorry about that, I had to go there)

Halloween

Released: 1978

Directed by: John Carpenter

Starring: Donald Pleasence, Jamie Lee Curtis

Plot: 6 year old Michael Myers kills his sister and is placed into an institution for life, but 15 years later he escapes and returns to his home town to kill again. His psychologist Dr Loomis follows in order to try and stop him.

For: Often cited as the original ‘slasher’ film (along with Black Christmas), Carpenter’s tale of holiday horror still holds up today. And despite its reputation for violence and gore, it actually shows very little, preferring to use the ‘what you don’t see’ method. And that poster is awesome!

Against: Some scenes a little boring / Pleasence over acts.

Favourite Scene: Laurie vs Michael round 2

Rating: 4 Lukes

Halloween

Released: 2007

Directed by: Rob Zombie

Starring: Tyler Mane, Roddy McDowell, Scout Taylor-Compton

Plot: 10 year old Michael Myers kills his family and a local bully and is placed into an institution for life. 15 years later he escapes and returns to his home town to kill again. His psychologist Dr Loomis follows in order to try and stop him.

For: Although not really necessary for the plot, I quite like the new scenes explaining Michael’s insanity. Also, McDowell is quite good as Loomis.

Against: Zombie throws ‘less is more’ out the window and revels in the gore. It’s a shame because otherwise this isn’t that bad.

Favourite Scene: The opening scenes.

Rating: 3 Lukes

Winner: The original has more class and is actually creepy.

The Omega Man

Disclaimer: I know that there was an earlier version of Matheson’s novel  – 1964’s The Last Man on Earth with Vincent Price, but I haven’t seen it 🙁

Released: 1971

Directed by: Boris Sagal

Starring: Charlton Heston, Rosalind Cash, Anthony Zerbe

Plot: Biological warfare between China and the Soviet Union wipes out most of the world’s population, leaving behind albino mutants called The Family, a group of young people who are slowly succumbing to the plague, and Robert Neville, the only person immune to the disease.

For: Heston is always over the top fun / Has one of the first on screen interracial kisses

Against: Deviates so far from the source material it might as well have not even bothered crediting it / The Family are terrible villains / I know it’s a classic but I just don’t like it 🙂

Favourite Scene: Neville slowly going mad in his apartment

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

I Am Legend

Released: 2007

Directed by: Francis Lawrence

Starring: Will Smith, Alice Braga

Plot: A proposed cancer cure mutates into a deadly virus that wipes out the majority of the population, as well as mutating the few survivors into monsters. But Robert Neville is immune and is trying to find a cure before he goes mad from loneliness.

For: Will Smith is terrific and I’ll watch anything he is in / The first 30 mins are great – the sense of loneliness and isolation are well done

Against: Deviates from the novel even more than Omega Man does / The villains are terrible CGI creations / I like the dog, but having it takes away some of drama and lessens the impact of Nevile’s loneliness

Favourite Scene: Neville loses it in the video store

Rating: 3 Lukes

Winner: I Am Legend by a nose, and only because it has Will Smith.

Let the Right One In

Released: 2008

Directed by: Tomas Alfredson

Starring: Lina Leanderson, Kare Hedebrant, Per Ragnar

Plot: 12 year old Oskar is bullied at school and leads a lonely life without friends and divorced parents. Then he meets new neighbor Eli and everything changes.

For: The young actors are terrific / Beautifully shot / More romantic and endearing than any of that Twilight rubbish

Against: The ambiguity of whether Eli is in fact a boy or a girl is a bit weird, and with the rest of that sub plot removed from the film it becomes pointless / The cat attack scene is pretty silly

Favourite Scene: I can’t have just one – Oskar meets Eli for the first time / Oskar taunts Eli into entering the apartment without being invited / the boyfriend/girlfriend discussion

Rating: 4.5 Lukes

Let Me In

Released: 2010

Directed by: Matt Reeves

Starring: Kodi Smit-McPhee, Chloe Grace Moretz, Elias Koteas

Plot: 12 year old Owen is bullied at school and leads a lonely life without friends and divorced parents. Then he meets new neighbor Abbie and everything changes

For: An almost perfect remake

Against: Remaking a film just because a majority of your audience is too lazy to read is lame / The 2 stars of the original had no acting experience before making their film and I think it helps their performances, however both Kodi and Chloe are professional actors and it shows. Not a major problem, but an interesting difference.

Favourite Scene: Owen meets Abbie for the first time / Owen buys Abbie some candy / the boyfriend/girlfriend discussion

Rating: 4.5 Lukes

Winner: A tie! Both brings something to the table and are both excellent films

Next up, a special triple review!

King Kong

Released: 1933

Directed by: Merian C Cooper & Ernest B Schoedsack

Starring: Bruce Cabot, Fay Ray, Robert Armstrong

Plot: Carl Denham convinces actress Ann Darrow to accompany him and his crew to a mysterious island to film a movie. But when they get there Ann is captured by villagers and offered as sacrifice to a giant ape-man called Kong. Instead of killing her, Kong falls in love with her and takes her back to his cave. She is eventually rescued by the remaining crew and Kong is captured. Back in New York Kong is placed on display but breaks his bonds, grabs Ann and climbs to the top of the Empire State Building, where he is attacked by planes and killed.

For: The stop motion is great and once they get to the island the action is full on. It also has one of the best endings in cinema.

Against: Boring as hell before the island.

Favourite Scene: Kong vs the planes

Rating: 3.5 Lukes

King Kong

Released: 1976

Directed by: John Guillermin

Starring: Jeff Bridges, Jessica Lange, Charles Grodin

Plot: An oil tycoon finds out about a mysterious island he believes is rich in oil. He sets out to claim it and on the way deals with stowaway Jack Prescot, and Dwan an aspiring actress, who they find adrift in a raft. At the island they discover the oil is useless and Dwan is captured by the locals for sacrifice to their god Kong. Kong is revealed to be a giant ape-man, who takes Dwan but instead of killing her is bemused by her rambling and falls in love with her. Dwan is eventually rescued and Kong is captured and taken to New York and put on display. During the commotion Kong sees Dwan being jostled by reporters, breaks free of his bonds and kidnaps her. Kong eventually ends up at the top of the World Trade Centre, where he is attacked by military choppers and killed.

For: Although very clunky by today’s standards, the FX was top stuff then and you can see why. Some cool scenes and always good to see Jeff Bridges / great score by John Barry / Better than 1998 Godzilla

Against: Seriously, ‘Dwan’ (I know she explains that it is really ‘Dawn’ and she changed it to be memorable, but come on) / The campness is sometimes over the top

Favourite Scene: Kong vs the military

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

King Kong

Released: 2005

Directed by: Peter Jackson

Starring: Naomi Watts, Jack Black, Adrien Brody, Andy Serkis

Plot: Carl Denham convinces actress Ann Darrow to accompany him and his crew to a mysterious island to film a movie. But when they get there Ann is captured by villagers and offered as sacrifice to a giant ape called Kong. Instead of killing her, Kong falls in love with her and takes her back to his cave. She is eventually rescued by the remaining crew and Kong is captured. Back in New York Kong is placed on display but breaks his bonds, grabs Ann and climbs to the top of the Empire State Building, where he is attacked by planes and killed.

For: Serkis’ performance as Kong is magnificent / Naomi Watts is lovely / very moving and some breathtaking cinematography

Against: Its way too long / Ann and Kong on the frozen lake

Favourite Scene: Kong vs the 3 T-Rexs & Kong vs the planes

Rating: 3.5 Lukes

Winner: It’s a tie between the original and Jackson’s remake! Controversy? 🙂

Next I’ll have the fourth and final part.

Continuing my look at film remakes- good and bad 🙂

Rear Window

Released: 1954

Directed by: Alfred Hitchcock

Starring: James Stewart, Grace Kelly, Raymond Burr

Plot: Professional photographer Jeff (Stewart) has a broken leg so spends his time observing his neighbors through the window. But when he starts to believe that his neighbor has murdered his wife he enlists the aid of his beautiful girlfriend Lisa (Kelly) to help investigate.

For: My favourite Hitchock film and a master class of suspense, drama and humour.

Against: Nothing

Favourite Scene: Too many to mention, probably Lisa in Thorwald’s apartment.

Rating: 5 Lukes

Disturbia

Released: 2007

Directed by: D.J Caruso

Starring: Shia LaBeouf, David Morse

Plot: While serving house arrest, teenager Kale (LeBeouf) becomes convinced that new neighbor is a serial killer.

For: It’s become fashionable recently to bag Shia LeBeouf. I can see why, he does appear to be in every film released in the past few years (a friend of mine has a tshirt saying Enough LeBeouf! on it!), but I’m not ashamed to admit I like the guy. He is in some woeful films, but he has a screen presence I seem to like so I’m willing to give him a go, and in this he doesn’t disappoint. Decent performances / always good to see David Morse.

Against: The first two thirds of this film are ok (2.5 Lukes) but then it turns into a piece of rubbish teen ‘horror’ film so common these days. Also, not having the decency to admit you’re a remake just so you don’t have to pay royalties is lame.

Favourite Scene: Kale thinks his friend is trapped with the killer

Rating: 1.5 Lukes

Winner: Its not even a contest – Rear Window

The Day the Earth Stood Still

Released: 1951

Directed by: Robert Wise

Starring: Michael Rennie, Patricia Neal, Hugh Marlowe, Gort

Plot: An alien, Klaatu, comes to Earth with a warning, ‘Live in peace, or we’ll take over.’

For: Brilliant stuff. One of my favourite films of all time. Its message is no less relevant today than it was then.

Against: Nothing, even the kid doesn’t annoy me 🙂

Favourite Scene: Klaatu is shot and Gort is activated / All electrical devices around the world stop at once.

Rating: 5 Lukes

The Day the Earth Stood Still

Released: 2008

Directed by: Scott Derrickson

Starring: Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Jaden Smith

Plot: An alien, Klaatu, comes to Earth with a warning, ‘Stop destroying the Earth, or we’ll kill you all.’

For: Although different, GORT is still cool. The spacecraft is a visual treat. Jennifer Connelly is lovely as always.

Against: The story is aimless / I wanted Jaden Smith’s character dead within the first 5 minutes / Keanu takes robotic acting to a whole new level.

Favourite Scene: Klaatu’s arrival on Earth

Rating: 2 Lukes

Winner: The original will always be remembered as the classic it is, long after the pretender fades away.

Dawn of the Dead

Released: 1978

Directed by: George Romero

Starring: David Emge, Ken Foree, Gaylen Ross

Plot: As a zombie apocalypse hits a group of survivors hole up in a local shopping mall.

For: For most zombie aficionados there is no substitute. Human vs Zombie, Human vs Human and the ultimate statement of the insanity of man’s consumerism.

Against: Some of the characterisation is one dimensional.

Favourite Scene: The final stand

Rating: 4 Lukes

Dawn of the Dead

Released: 2004

Directed by: Zack Snyder

Starring: Sarah Polly, Ving Rhames, Jack Weber,Ty Burrell

Plot: As a zombie apocalypse hits a group of survivors hole up in a local shopping mall.

For: Zombie Baby! (they had the balls to do it). Believable characters, the Anti Zombie bus

Against: Zombie Baby! (they actually did it). Modern Family’s Ty Burrell as a bastard – Noooo! Going after the girl who ran after the dog – screw that, let her die!

Favourite Scene: Celebrity look-alike zombie shoot

Rating: 3 Lukes

Winner: Although I quite enjoy Snyder’s effort, the original is clearly the better film.

The Fly

Released: 1958

Directed by: Kurt Nuemann

Starring: Vincent Price, David Hedison, Patricia Owens

Plot: A scientist has a horrific accident when he tries to use his newly invented teleportation device and is fused with a fly.

For: Although a bit subdued and campy at times, the original Fly is a classic of the man/monster genre.

Against: A bit subdued and campy at times and the usually brilliant Vincent Price sleepwalks through the film.

Favourite Scene: Help Meeeee!

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

The Fly

Released: 1986

Directed by: David Cronenberg

Starring: Jeff Goldblum, Geena Davis

Plot: A brilliant but eccentric scientist begins to transform into a giant man/fly hybrid after one of his experiments goes horribly wrong.

For: A re-imagining of the original story that focuses on the horror of losing your humanity through the degeneration of your body. The characters are more likeable and situation more believeable. Jeff Goldblum is a legend.

Against: The ending becomes a bit silly.

Favourite Scene: The arm wrestle / the Brundle-Fly video documentation

Rating: 4 Lukes

Winner: Not all remakes are bad. Cronenbergs’ The Fly is a classic of ‘body horror’ and takes the concept to a new level.

Fright Night

Released: 1985

Directed by: Tom Holland

Starring: William Ragsdale, Chris Sarandon, Amanda Bearse, Roddy McDowell

Plot: For young Charlie Brewster nothing could be better than an old horror movie late at night. But when he discovers that his new neighbour is a vampire he turns to Peter Vincent, the host of  TV show, Fright Night and former film vampire hunter. Together they overcome their own fears to battle the handsome vampire.

For: A fun 80’s teen comedy horror with likeable performances and a great idea. It also had some impressive FX work for a film of its time.

Against: Charlie Brewster isn’t very likeable, Amanda Bearse looks annoyed to be in the film.

Favourite Scene: Peter learns that Charlie was telling the truth

Rating: 3.5 Lukes

Fright Night

Released: 2011

Directed by:

Starring: Anton Yelchin, Colin Farrell, David Tennant, Imogen Poots

Plot: Charlie Brewster wants nothing more than to be with his gorgeous girlfriend, hang with the cool kids and pretend that his nerdy past never existed. So when his former friend Ed tells him that a vampire is killing people in the neighbourhood he brushes him off. Then he learns the truth and asks Peter Vincent, the star of a Vegas show called Fright Night, to help him. Together they overcome their own fears to battle the handsome vampire and protect Charlie’s family.

For: Actually not bad. Farrell is clearly having fun and the makers are respectful of the source material without being slavish to it. It moves along at a solid clip and is never boring.

Against: Charlie Brewster is a douchebag. How he gets Amy to like him is beyond me. The change to Peter Vincent’s back story is terrible. I wont spoil it here but it is a bad choice.

Favourite Scene: Charlie gets Jerry beers and is finally convinced that his friend Ed was right.

Rating: 3 Lukes

Winner: The original by a nose!

More in part 3!

Hollywood receives a lot of flak for its copious amounts of remakes and reboots, and it does certainly feel that the creative well in Hollywood has wrung dry. But the truth is, remakes are nothing new. In fact D.W.Griffith remade his own 1914 film Battle of the Sexes again in 1928. There are plenty of other early examples as well – Beau Geste (original 1926, remake 1939), The Cat and the Canary (original 1927, remake 1939) and The Dawn Patrol (original 1930, remake 1938) to name just a few. A lot of people also ignore the fact that some remakes have improved on the originals.

So for this series of Spotlight On…. I thought I would focus on the some of the highs and lows of the world of film remakes. This is by no means all known remakes, only a selection of the ones I have seen. A more complete list can be found on Wikipedia (but without my valuable opinion of course!).

The Amityville Horror

Released: 1979

Directed by: Stuart Rosenberg

Starring: James Brolin, Margot Kidder, Rod Steiger

Plot: A family move into a haunted house, where grisly murders occurred only a year before.

For: Occasionally creepy

Against: Not creepy enough, and definitely not scary.

Favourite Scene: The father (Brolin) goes mad

Rating: 1.5 Lukes

The Amityville Horror

Released: 2005

Directed by: Andrew Douglas

Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George

Plot: A family move into a haunted house, where grisly murders occurred.

For: Decent non-CGI effects, Melissa George is actually a good actress, and always happy to see Ryan Reynolds on screen 🙂

Against: Not scary. Good haunted house stories focus on what you cant see, not throw it all in your face.

Favourite Scene: The father (Reynolds) goes mad

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

Winner: The 2005 version is more watchable, but only just.

Assault on Precinct 13

Released: 1976

Directed by: John Carpenter

Starring: Austin Stoker, Darwin Joston

Plot: In what is essentially a remake of Rio Bravo, a police officer defends a defunct precinct against an attack by a relentless criminal gang, aided by a murderer and a few others.

For: Relentless and brutal. Great ending.

Against: Some of the acting is pretty bad. Julie dies!

Favourite Scene: Bishop asks Wilson to walk out of the station with him.

Rating: 3 Lukes

Assault on Precinct 13

Released: 2005

Directed by: Jean-Francois Richet

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Laurence Fishburne, Gabriel Byrne

Plot: A loose remake of the original, a group of police and criminals defend Precinct 13 against a group of corrupt police.

For: Some nice action. Always good to see Gabriel Byrne.

Against: Story is pretty bad, and some of the acting is terrible.

Favourite Scene: Can’t think of one.

Rating: 2 Lukes

Winner: Carpenter’s original is still the best.

Cape Fear

Released: 1962

Directed by: J Lee Thompson

Starring: Gregory Peck, Robert Mitchum

Plot: Convicted rapist Max Cady is released from prison and immediately begins a terror campaign against the family of lawyer Sam Bowden, who he holds responsible for his conviction.

For: A classic. Mitchum is mesmerising as the disgusting Cady. Whenever he is on screen you can’t help but be captivated.

Against: I’m not a Telly Savalas fan. He annoys me and whenever he is on screen it puts me right off. Weird but true.

Favourite Scene: There are plenty of classic scenes, but Cady’s final all out attack on the family wins it.

Rating: 4 Lukes

Cape Fear

Released: 1991

Directed by: Martin Scorsese

Starring: Robert De Niro, Nick Nolte, Juliette Lewis, Jessica Lange

Plot: Convicted rapist Max Cady is released from prison and immediately begins a terror campaign against the family of lawyer Sam Bowden, who he finds out withheld evidence that could have gotten him a lighter sentence or acquittal.

For: A tour de force from De Niro as the psychotic Cady, and a great performance from Lewis as the daughter Danielle.

Against: Cady hiding under the car as they travel to Cape Fear. A few blocks maybe, but all the way up-state – come on! Also, Jessica Lange is terrible.

Favourite Scene: Cady seduces Danielle – creepy and fascinating.

Rating: 4 Lukes

Winner: This a too close to call – a tie!

Clash of the Titans

Released: 1981

Directed by: Desmond Davis

Starring: Harry Hamlin, Judy Bowker, Sir Laurence Olivier, Neil McCarthy, Maggie Smith

Plot: Perseus, the illegitimate son of Zeus, defeats various foes in order to rescue his love Andromeda from the fearsome Kraken

For: Good old fashion fun. Although it vears from the original story a bit, it is never boring and features some amazing stop motion work from Ray Harryhausen, including Medusa.

Against: Hamlin can’t act. Bubo is overused and becomes tiresome.

Favourite Scene: Medusa!

Rating: 4 Lukes

Clash of the Titans

Released: 2010

Directed by: Louis Leterrier

Starring: Sam Worthington, Gemma Arteton, Ralph Fiennes, Liam Neeson, Mads Mikkelsen

Plot: Fisherman Perseus survives the death of his family and is unwillingly thrust into a war of the Gods when it is discovered he is in fact the son of Zeus. He renounces his divine heritage and fights for the cause of mortals.

For: The Medusa sequence, Bubo’s cameo, good performance from Mikkelsen.

Against: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – Sam Worthington is friggin’ terrible. Hollywood please stop giving this man work. The so called action is boring, the tacked on 3D is laughably bad, and the performances are terrible. It also has one of the worst marketing slogans I have ever seen – Titans Will Clash! Groan.

Favourite Scene: The Medusa sequence

Rating: 1 Luke

Winner: The original Titans stomps all over the piece of crap remake.

More in part 2 🙂

Often hailed as one of the greatest science fiction film series, the Alien series has some ups and downs, but is still one of my favourite series.

ALIEN

Released: 1979

Directed by: Ridley Scott

Written by: Dan O’Bannon, Ronald Shusett,

Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, John Hurt, Harry Dean Stanton, Yaphet Kotto, Veronica Cartright, Ian Holm

Plot: A mining ship investigates a suspected SOS, landing on a distant planet. There they discover a strange egg and the horror begins.

For: Successfully combines horror and sci-fi into a perfect blend. Stand out performances. The introduction of the Alien, one of the most iconic creatures in film, and Ripley, a well realised heroine. A landmark film.

Against: The multiple shots of the crew waking up is a bit much.

Favourite Scene: Too many to list them all – the chestburster, Dallas in the vents, the showdown between the crew and Ripley at the airlock.

Rating: 5 Lukes

ALIENS

Released: 1986

Directed by: James Cameron

Written by: James Cameron, David Giler, Walter Hill

Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn, Carrie Hess, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton

Plot: Fifty seven years after Ellen Ripley survived her disastrous ordeal, her escape vessel is recovered after drifting across the galaxy as she slept in cryogenic stasis. During this period LV-426 has been colonized, however all communication with the colony has been lost. The Company enlists Ripley to aid a team of tough, rugged space marines on a rescue mission, but the worst is yet to come.

For: Another sci-fi classic and Cameron’s best film. Cameron amps up the action without compromising plot and gives another facet to Ripley in her maternal bond with Newt.

Against: Nothing. Every scene is gold.

Favourite Scene: Everything! But if I have to specify, the Marines learn Ripley doesn’t like the corn bread (or androids), the first encounter with the Aliens, Ripley and Newt trapped with the face huggers, ‘Get away from her you bitch!’, the survivors discuss their future ‘Hey, maybe you haven’t been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal! ‘.

Rating: 5 Lukes

ALIEN 3

Released: 1992

Directed by: David Fincher

Written by: Vincent Ward, David Giler, Walter Hill, Larry Ferguson

Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Charles Dance, Charles S Dutton

Plot: After escaping from LV-426, the ship carrying Ellen Ripley crashes onto a remote and inhabited ore refinery/male only prison. While they decide what to do with her, Ripley discovers the horrifying reason for her crash: An alien stowaway. As the alien matures and begins to kill off the inhabitants, Ripley is unaware that her true enemy is more than just the killer alien.

For: The story behind the making of this film is extraordinary. I highly recommend checking it out. The tunnel chases are well done, the alien itself looks interesting, the bit in the medical room is tense. Always good to see Charles Dance.

Against: Has some major flaws, especially in characterisation, SFX and pacing. It also kills off Hicks and Newt, which is a slap in the face.

Favourite Scene: Ripley comes face to face with the alien in the medical room

Rating: 2.5 Lukes

ALIEN RESURRECTION

Released: 1997

Directed by: Jean-Pierre Jeunet

Written by: Joss Whedon

Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Winona Ryder, Ron Perlman

Plot: 200 years after her death, Ellen Ripley is revived as a powerful human/Alien hybrid clone who must continue her war against the Aliens.

For: The room of rejected Ripley clones, the basketball game, character interaction between the criminals is fun.

Against: The Newborn. You don’t have any reason to root for the Betty crew, they are all scumbag people smugglers after all.

Favourite Scene: Ripley finds the room of rejected Ripley clones

Rating: 1.5 Lukes

Let me know what you think. Agree/Disagree? Leave a Comment, I would love to hear from you!